ECN Forum Forums General Topics of the Trade General Discussion Area Totally Burned Out

First off, I to have been there. One big reason was that, tho I would take some time off now and then, I usually worked for family during those times. The key here is to balance your work with your off time. Take that vacation, and do it often. Just do anything that is different from your worklife.

Also don't worry to much. Life goes on, with or without your worrying about it. Don't sweat the small stuff!

Do get a physical, now! If need be, visit a shrink. Don't let depression go to long. It will affect your health, in one way or another.

If you can, volunteer for the less needy. Nothing like seeing a street person accept his 1st meal in a week from you. Or visit the local nursing home, and take someone for a stroll outside.

Stay the course with your faith, whatever it is. Visit with like-minded people.

But most of all, don't forget to wear sunscreen!

Rick Miell

Doc,
Several people have touched on this subject, However I feel that for your sake I should approach it directly. The feelings you describe are symptoms of something called clinical depression. Yes, many people may be saying to themselves, "DUH". But somebody needs to say it to you bluntly, The first step to getting better is to accept the fact then try to understand your illness. That is what it is, an illness. Something that can be managed to improve the quality of your life, if not cured entirely.

Please, Please talk to your doctor. You don't have to spend hundreds of dollars an hour to talk to a psychiatrist. Your family doctor or even your county clinic will be able to help you.

Let me ask you this. Do you get these feelings around this time of year? If so, you may have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I had a friend who would put his house up for sale every fall because he felt he could not put up with another Chicago winter. If you do get these feelings seasonally, you need to tell this to your doctor. Please don't be hesitant about this. It sounds like you've been depressed for a few years now. There are more people suffering from Clinical Depression in the United States than there are Electricians.

Your doctor may prescribe some medication for you (and I hope he does). Just because your on medication DOES NOT mean your crazy or there's something horribly wrong with you. The antidepressants they make now are not the psychosematic drugs of yesteryear. Pick up any womans magazine and you will find glossy ads with flowers on them for different medications, these are Antidepressants. The side effects are very minimal. However, you do need to understand that they are not like taking a Tylenol. It will take at least three weeks before they begin to make a difference. Because their effects are so gradual, you will probably not be the one to notice they are working. Usually your wife or kids will notice first that you are getting better and "not as moody as you used to be".

You said you've been feeling this way for a few years. Well you seem to understand that it is not going to go away on it's own. You've taken a great leap by reaching out to your friends, and we are your friends, for help. Please listen to me, and to us and get some help! It's the last week of September right now. I hope we get another post from you around Halloween to hear how your feeling. If you go to the doctor in the next week, you should be feeling a little better by then. Just think, Christmas might be a little better this year. Could it hurt to give it a try?

If you, or anyone else needs someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me at: Pearlfish<at>Ameritech<dot>Net

Good luck Doc.

Your friend,
Steve

Y'all here helped me through a depression about a year ago...

I'm 36 years old, going on my 3rd year as a contractor. My partner Joe is also 36, and he's been doing this for about 7 years. He's clinically bipolar, and struggles with it all of the time... I've been diagnosed with depression many times. We both complain of either working to much, or when we're not working, we're worried about of being broke, which I've discovered will set me into a depression quicker than anything. Anyway, you're not alone, Doc. The advice here may or may not work for you, but it's my experience.

One of the things that keeps me going is knowing that being a contractor is not the end, but just another stepping stone to where I do not know. In my life, I've been a vending route driver, full-line vending manager, small engine mechanic, lawn care tech, convenience store owner, rock band member, and only took the electrician thing seriously back in about 95 or 96...

Lately, I've hoped that maybe I'm leading up to something bigger, either in the inspection, consulting, or education area (or all three)... Goodness knows that my home locale needs these things... I'm in no hurry, haven't even taken my inspector's tests yet... (I've had the books on loan for a long time too! Ooops!) I feel all in good time...

I guess the important thing is to not feel "stuck"...

When working for other companies in Wisconsin, the fact that it was all leading up to me getting out on my own was what kept me going then... The goals and dreams need to stay just slightly ahead of the progress...

Hope this helps...

-Virgil


[This message has been edited by sparky66wv (edited 09-23-2002).]

you forward a good point Steve, and really no one is exempt. As i understand it, depression goes undetected or diagnosed quite often ( check this month's Readers Digest)

as to motovation, or motivational aids...... well...i guess we all need to pick what works for us and stick with it.

I must confess to highs and lows , the latter mostly attubuted to customers that seem to get off on making your life hell.

I suppose a way vent , (club baby seals ?)....would be prudent.

anyway you can do it, keep the faith brother.

Several have mentioned go see a doctor.
Been thru something similar. Do you snore alot? Gasp and stop breathing in your sleep? May want to get tested for sleep apnea. Made an unbelivable difference in my quality of life once I started getting a good nights sleep and the effect was almost immediate. Feel free to email any questions you may have if this is the case.

Doc, dont feel like the lone ranger! I am a burnt piece if toast myself. About 450 days with out a day off (except Sunday some times). I work all night on orders, bids, takeoffs and book keeping till the wee hours of the morning. With six employees spread out over 15 jobs in three counties.

Often I ask myself why even get out of bed. To make the supply house richer... To make my insurance agent richer... To make the IRS richer. I don't know the answer really. I guess it's just what I do.

I'm 34, married, no kids, college graduate. I get to spend very little time with my wife and get to see my parents about twice a year.

The only thing I can say is that I have the power to harness electrons and make them work in a safe fashion. It's what I do.

Take a break and I'll take one too. We have to look around to get a grasp of where we really are in life. Look at it from a different angle and it might not look too bad.

Good Luck.

me too, been doing this too long to hate it, but i guess we all have our bad days...

Doc, are you an independant contractor? I hated working for someone. Did it for 10 years. I hated my life for a long time and was always looking for a reason to leave. One day my ex-employer gave me one. Moved to another state, worked for someone again, was miserable, hated life...
Moved back to my home state, worked for someone, hated life. Realized that some of us are meant to be employees and some of us are meant to be employers. Mine was the later. Started my own buisness, had tons of headaches but through it all, I wouldn't give it up for the world. I create my own time to spend with my family, I am always challenged, not by electrical problems but by buisness problems. It's a whole new learning experience for me. I enjoy that!
Need that!
This is not the remedy for life but maybe a leap of faith wouldn't be a bad idea. Take a challenge that you would not normally take. Get exited over what you are doing. If you can't, do something else. Life is too short to be sad or miserable. Pave your own way and don't let anyone tell you you can't...
Tom

Wow. Reading this string about brings a tear to my eye. I could have written Doc's post myself and then to see so many of you other guys have gone through this "down" time really amazes me.

As most of you know, back at the beginning of July I gave up my business of 10 years and went to work for someone else. One of the reasons that I did it is that I also lost that drive that I had when I started out. You know... hoping to get big, have a lot of jobs going, paying men a living wage (not just for them but something a family could live on also)as well as making a comfortable living for myself and my family.

After losing my a** on a couple of jobs and could no longer see that light at the end of the tunnel, I continued the business because it wasn't just a job it was "ME". I loved what I did so much that I did it far longer than I should have.

Even still when I tell someone that I'm no longer in business, its like I'm telling them that someone died.

The constant struggle of getting jobs, collecting money from customers and paying bills served no other purpose other than to make my suplier, insurance company and banker richer. This never ending cycle is enough to send anyone into what some of you are calling depression.

It was one day that one of my key employees (one of the guys that I was trying to take care of) screwed me over that I finally and literally said "Screw it all!" and gave it up.

As some of you said, sometimes a change is good. But, I miss "MY" business. But working for someone else is getting better.

Getting off at a regular time presents me with a new problem. What do I do after work?
I don't have to do any bids or any other paperwork. Don't have to return phone calls or go look at new jobs. Heck, I never had a hobby. Work was my hobby and my life. What do I do now?

I was working so much that it started affecting my marriage also. This is another reason that I quit.

I once had a girlfriend that was diagnosed with clinical depression and I recognized (or I thought I did)some of the symptoms in myself. I started seeing a therapist who is helping. Just having someone to talk to letting me know that I'm not the only one that goes through this type of thing is very helpful and reassuring.

The therapist says that I'm not suffering from depression and has prescribed no drugs or recommended that I get a physical. Although the physical probably wouldn't be a bad idea.

So my advice Doc is to definatelty talk to your doctor or possibly a therapist. I go every two weeks for about six weeks now. Costs me about $50 per visit. It does help. My wife has noticed a difference.

Your post was a step in the right direction. Keep going. And your apparent faith in God will always help.

The replies to the post were reassuring to me.

We definately have a great group here.

Doc, do you enjoy working with youth? I have found at times when it is so hard to go on the youth at my church have helped. By teaching them some of my skills,I also do carpentry, I have realized what I really have. Try Habitat for Humanity volunteer work, work with the youth at church, do any type of volunteer work. I could continue on and echo what others have said but I'll just say hang in there , get some help from a counselor or pastor and I'll be thinking of you. Spkjpr P.S. I'm 45 and have just worked through where you are at.

[This message has been edited by spkjpr (edited 09-23-2002).]