ECN Forum
Posted By: The Watt Doctor Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 01:10 PM
I would love to testify of this perfect job that I have, and how I love going to work every day, but I can't. I'm tired. The thing that is so painful is, the problem lies with me. I have no motivation, and haven't for the last couple of years. This thread could go in any direction, but I would like to keep it work related. I know my convictions concerning God and family.
I guess my question is, when you reach down inside to grab whatever it takes to keep going to work every day, and there is nothing there to grab hold of, what do you do?
I'm 35 years old, and I know that I have several more "working" years in front of me. Right now I just don't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I know that I'm not the only one who has ever felt this way. I just want my visit to this state of mind to end as soon as possible.
Any word of advice would be obliged.

With an open heart,
Doc
Posted By: jlhmaint Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 01:50 PM
Hi DOC,

Iam 30yrs old married with 4kids, have struggled all my life to get what i have now and i don't have much a modest home an old truck and an older van for the wife. I know what you mean i went back to school to get a degree to better myself and still looking for that great job. There have been many days when i just wanted to throw it all away. The why bother attitude iam not getting anywere whats the point. but i do love what i do and know that it can only get better and when i look at the pitcure of my kids on my tool box it keeps me going. But also remember that if you are not happy in what you are doing there is only one person who can change that and it is you. There are positive things in all that you do dig deep and hold onto them and your family. there are people alot worse than me or you who have no jobs homes or money to feed there kids let alone buy them a new bike. and if you have spent years working maybe if you have the money you should take some much needed time off and spend with the family that has been your driving force for somany years. I wish you luck DOC, I think we all have been were you are now.
Posted By: pauluk Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 02:01 PM
Doc,
I understand how you feel; I guess we've all been there at some time or another.

I'm 36, single, no kids. Not that I wouldn't love to have a family as I'm sure that loved ones provide such a much-needed boost to ones desire to keep going for them as much as for oneself. But it just hasn't happened for me yet.

Have you ever thought about branching out, doing some slightly different work within your field? Maybe that would provide a change of scenery, so to speak. Or maybe even talk it over with the family and decide upon a radically different lifestyle?

You know, the sort of thing that "crazy" people do, such as move to somewhere in South America and help provide power to remote villages, or something like that. Still the work you know and understand, but looked at from a somewhat different perspective. O.K., maybe I'm crazy, but sometimes a radical change is what's needed. (Like when I packed up and went out to Nebraska.)
Posted By: bobc Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 02:14 PM
Doc,i know what you are feeling.six years ago this happened to me.during this time my wife of 20 years was diagnosed with terminal cancer.faith in god support from co workers etc got me thru this time.i realize now that i was bored with my work lost interest etc.as men our work is our pride when we lose interest it affects us.this feeling will pass,open the bible there is always peace to be found within its pages.god bless
Posted By: mamills Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 02:39 PM
Good Morning Doc;
This is a situation I've been fighting for a number of years now. I'm 49 years old, and have worked at Wharton County Junior College in Wharton for the past 27 years (going on 28...sounds even longer that way, doesn't it...). Lately, my standard response to "how long have you worked there" has been "too ^*&%&% long!" Many days, I feel more like a commodity than a human being, working harder, and getting paid less, and feeling like there is no value in my life. When I don't have the ball and chain on, I spend my time doing things which do bring some value to me - working part time as a Paramedic with our local EMS, being a volunteer firefighter, playing the organ for my church, and doing lighting design for my community theatre group here. I also operate a small commercial sound business and provide equipment for stage productions and special events in the area. And somewhere in the midst of all this, I have a wonderful family - my wife and two children, the oldest of which has just received her R.N. and works at the local hospital.

I guess what I'm saying by all this. Doc, is that I realize things at work could be a heck of a lot better. But at the same time, at the end of eight hours, I turn off the lights and go home and thoroughly enjoy my family and activities. These are the things that I work for, these are the things that I live for.

I used to think that I was absolutely insane for staying at the same place for twenty-some-odd years, when many people around me change jobs as often as five times in the space of a year. I guess the reason I stay with it is because the job is there, and the paycheck keeps coming at the end of each month.

My thoughts and prayers are with you, Doc. Whatever you decide to do, I hope all works out well for you. [Linked Image]

Mike (mamills)

Don't forget your friends here at ECN!
Posted By: Trainwire Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 03:01 PM
Um, Allow me to recommend some reading. If I correctly read between the lines here, I think this might aim you in a direction that will help. I was/am in the same place, but I think I am understanding things a little better now, with some things I learned through this book. Try "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge, www.ransomedheart.com.
been there, done that, moving on without necessarally changing the address.

Trainwire
Posted By: George Corron Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 03:07 PM
Doc,
Sorry to hear it. BOY have I been there. I think if I could have gotten a job cooking fries at McD's I would have years ago.

Paul, Yup, it's definitely the kids that make me get up a lot of mornings, they've grown used to eating, and the banker just insists he hear from me once a month too! (frankly, he ain't got long to hear from me though ).

Keep smiling, you don't have to lie to yourself and tell you it's enjoyable, that won't help anyway. The things I do on the side are probably where I get my enjoyment, and that sure as H@#l ain't electrical work. For me it's teaching, and FCC related items, but it's a relief valve.

As for church, burned out on that years ago as well, not God understand, and I still do individual study groups etc.. Enjoy it immensely.

Wish I had a magic solution for you, bro., but there ain't one. One foot in front of the other and eventually the walking becomes normal again. Heck, I do have a dream job is what most people consider, and it's still tough sometimes to get up and come in.

What happened to construction work? I do have opinions, and heck, I'm part of the problem, but I don't see it getting a lot better.

I have a sign that hangs by my desk, it says "Everyone here is jealous cause the voices only talk to me!!" I also have one that hangs up when I'm off that says "The voices told me to stay home and clean the guns today". That kinda nonsense at least allows me to have it a bit light on occasion.

Hang in there and smile, it makes 'em wonder what you're up to!!!!

Walking with you dude,

George
Posted By: ThinkGood Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 04:22 PM
Watts Up, Doc?

(Some of what I have written here is directed at myself as well.)

May I suggest you contact your physician and get a full checkup--blood levels also.

"bobc" mentioned "as men our work is our pride when we lose interest it affects us."

Don't be too proud to talk this over with your physician. This sure sounds like depression. That can definitely affect your whole being--family life, social life, work, etc.

Wattever you decide, Doc, you're a young fellow and aside from the "working years" ahead, you have plenty of years ahead.

Sometimes one can not see the light at the end of the tunnel because they haven't gone around the curve yet...then it's right there, much closer than they ever would have imagined.

(Hey, you're a master electrician--rig up your own light!!)

Doc, take it easy, take it slow, but just take it--one day at a time.
Posted By: gramps Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 05:05 PM
i had a habit of going through one of those "burn-out" stages every 8 to 10 years, for a long time. the last time, i quit my business, turned it over to my son-in-law, and got a job selling electrical and plumbing supplies in the local hardware store. for 7.50 per hour!. a drastic change like that, however temporary, seems to work well for me, in flushing those "blues" outa my system. i went back to my business a few months later, feeling refreshed, and full of energy again. [Linked Image]

i know a man locally, right now, who is an electrical engineer, and a state inspector. he has taken an "indeterminate" leave of absence from his job, and is running a Bass Pro Shop.
others have gone into volunteer work through their churches, or Habitat for Humanity, or a Missions Ministry such as Samaritans Purse.
when i lost interest in doing the work for my own fulfillment, i re-focused, and kept on doing it, for my family. and, i pray a lot....... [Linked Image]



[This message has been edited by gramps (edited 09-23-2002).]
Posted By: wirewiz Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 05:12 PM
Doc,
Been there done that! It took me a while to realize that I was un-happy at work. For me it all came to a head when a promotion came up in a company I had been with for 10 years and I was passed over. (It went to a guy who had been with them on and off for about 8 years and he would quit if a better job came along at any time , and eventually ...he did) After being a company man for so long it took me 2 more years to realize that it was O.K. to make a change for the job I really wanted, to make work secondary and make the family number one. (I missed many school functions got home after 8:00PM many times and rescheduled vactions around a job completion. went in at 11:00 1:00 2:00 3:00 PM countless times and kept working on through the next day. Worked I don't know how many Saturdays always figuring it would pay off somewhere down the road) You can never get those days back!
During those 2 years I was the most moody unhappy person around. Looking back I am surprised I held my job, I would have let myself go within a few months I wouldn't work any OT, didn't take any crap from any of our customers. (in other words I had confrontations with all but one) [Linked Image] Even made a grown man cry so they tell me. (That one I am not ashamed of! He was a complete idiot and had no business doing what he was doing. As for the rest I should have been more cooperative I am not sure how I didn't burn any bridges)

If it was not on the plans I would not do it! If the plans were drawn wrong and I new it I went out of my way to try and get them to provide new plans before I would make changes. These were regular customers who started to rely on us for "Turn-Key" projects. Many times jobs were completed before we were given accurate plans. We were given these jobs without having to bid against anyone. When the new jobs were starting I would get the info from the owner of our company and I felt like the eternal apprentice. Some of the things that he would explain seemed so elementary. I felt like I could never get out from under his thumbs. (In his defense he used to teach first year apprentices and was a very good communicator) My nextell seemed to turn off for no apparent reason. I just felt as though all the extra miles I went before were for nothing. So for about a year I looked for that "Perfect Job" and when I found it I left. Stayed there for 2 years started as service manager and left as chief estimator and went back to the old company (I wanted to be with a company that I had helped build a solid repution for) for about 3 weeks. Once I was there for a week the hair on the back of my neck stood up when the same things started to happen again. I gave my notice and ...

I took a job out of state (never thought I would leave the area I grew up in) moved the family and life has been pretty good since. The job I took went south they lost there Government Contract so I opened up my own shop. Now at times I almost feel semi-retired. The wife works from 5:00 AM until 10:00 AM and I wait to start my day till after my daughter gets on the bus for school 8:00 AM. Now I schedule work around my life as much as possible, make sure I am at the school functions I missed before, volunteer at school now and then. Usually work in town, and play as much as possible.

I finally figured that life was too short to be un-happy at work.
Wirewiz
Posted By: rmiell Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 05:55 PM
First off, I to have been there. One big reason was that, tho I would take some time off now and then, I usually worked for family during those times. The key here is to balance your work with your off time. Take that vacation, and do it often. Just do anything that is different from your worklife.

Also don't worry to much. Life goes on, with or without your worrying about it. Don't sweat the small stuff!

Do get a physical, now! If need be, visit a shrink. Don't let depression go to long. It will affect your health, in one way or another.

If you can, volunteer for the less needy. Nothing like seeing a street person accept his 1st meal in a week from you. Or visit the local nursing home, and take someone for a stroll outside.

Stay the course with your faith, whatever it is. Visit with like-minded people.

But most of all, don't forget to wear sunscreen!

Rick Miell
Posted By: Pearlfish Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 09:10 PM
Doc,
Several people have touched on this subject, However I feel that for your sake I should approach it directly. The feelings you describe are symptoms of something called clinical depression. Yes, many people may be saying to themselves, "DUH". But somebody needs to say it to you bluntly, The first step to getting better is to accept the fact then try to understand your illness. That is what it is, an illness. Something that can be managed to improve the quality of your life, if not cured entirely.

Please, Please talk to your doctor. You don't have to spend hundreds of dollars an hour to talk to a psychiatrist. Your family doctor or even your county clinic will be able to help you.

Let me ask you this. Do you get these feelings around this time of year? If so, you may have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I had a friend who would put his house up for sale every fall because he felt he could not put up with another Chicago winter. If you do get these feelings seasonally, you need to tell this to your doctor. Please don't be hesitant about this. It sounds like you've been depressed for a few years now. There are more people suffering from Clinical Depression in the United States than there are Electricians.

Your doctor may prescribe some medication for you (and I hope he does). Just because your on medication DOES NOT mean your crazy or there's something horribly wrong with you. The antidepressants they make now are not the psychosematic drugs of yesteryear. Pick up any womans magazine and you will find glossy ads with flowers on them for different medications, these are Antidepressants. The side effects are very minimal. However, you do need to understand that they are not like taking a Tylenol. It will take at least three weeks before they begin to make a difference. Because their effects are so gradual, you will probably not be the one to notice they are working. Usually your wife or kids will notice first that you are getting better and "not as moody as you used to be".

You said you've been feeling this way for a few years. Well you seem to understand that it is not going to go away on it's own. You've taken a great leap by reaching out to your friends, and we are your friends, for help. Please listen to me, and to us and get some help! It's the last week of September right now. I hope we get another post from you around Halloween to hear how your feeling. If you go to the doctor in the next week, you should be feeling a little better by then. Just think, Christmas might be a little better this year. Could it hurt to give it a try?

If you, or anyone else needs someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me at: Pearlfish<at>Ameritech<dot>Net

Good luck Doc.

Your friend,
Steve
Posted By: sparky66wv Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 10:23 PM
Y'all here helped me through a depression about a year ago...

I'm 36 years old, going on my 3rd year as a contractor. My partner Joe is also 36, and he's been doing this for about 7 years. He's clinically bipolar, and struggles with it all of the time... I've been diagnosed with depression many times. We both complain of either working to much, or when we're not working, we're worried about of being broke, which I've discovered will set me into a depression quicker than anything. Anyway, you're not alone, Doc. The advice here may or may not work for you, but it's my experience.

One of the things that keeps me going is knowing that being a contractor is not the end, but just another stepping stone to where I do not know. In my life, I've been a vending route driver, full-line vending manager, small engine mechanic, lawn care tech, convenience store owner, rock band member, and only took the electrician thing seriously back in about 95 or 96...

Lately, I've hoped that maybe I'm leading up to something bigger, either in the inspection, consulting, or education area (or all three)... Goodness knows that my home locale needs these things... I'm in no hurry, haven't even taken my inspector's tests yet... (I've had the books on loan for a long time too! Ooops!) I feel all in good time...

I guess the important thing is to not feel "stuck"...

When working for other companies in Wisconsin, the fact that it was all leading up to me getting out on my own was what kept me going then... The goals and dreams need to stay just slightly ahead of the progress...

Hope this helps...

-Virgil


[This message has been edited by sparky66wv (edited 09-23-2002).]
Posted By: sparky Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 10:35 PM
you forward a good point Steve, and really no one is exempt. As i understand it, depression goes undetected or diagnosed quite often ( check this month's Readers Digest)

as to motovation, or motivational aids...... well...i guess we all need to pick what works for us and stick with it.

I must confess to highs and lows , the latter mostly attubuted to customers that seem to get off on making your life hell.

I suppose a way vent , (club baby seals ?)....would be prudent.

anyway you can do it, keep the faith brother.
Posted By: Currently Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 10:47 PM
Several have mentioned go see a doctor.
Been thru something similar. Do you snore alot? Gasp and stop breathing in your sleep? May want to get tested for sleep apnea. Made an unbelivable difference in my quality of life once I started getting a good nights sleep and the effect was almost immediate. Feel free to email any questions you may have if this is the case.
Posted By: arseegee Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/23/02 10:56 PM
Doc, dont feel like the lone ranger! I am a burnt piece if toast myself. About 450 days with out a day off (except Sunday some times). I work all night on orders, bids, takeoffs and book keeping till the wee hours of the morning. With six employees spread out over 15 jobs in three counties.

Often I ask myself why even get out of bed. To make the supply house richer... To make my insurance agent richer... To make the IRS richer. I don't know the answer really. I guess it's just what I do.

I'm 34, married, no kids, college graduate. I get to spend very little time with my wife and get to see my parents about twice a year.

The only thing I can say is that I have the power to harness electrons and make them work in a safe fashion. It's what I do.

Take a break and I'll take one too. We have to look around to get a grasp of where we really are in life. Look at it from a different angle and it might not look too bad.

Good Luck.
Posted By: sparky Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 12:25 AM
Quote
It's what I do.

me too, been doing this too long to hate it, but i guess we all have our bad days...
Posted By: tsolanto Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 12:26 AM
Doc, are you an independant contractor? I hated working for someone. Did it for 10 years. I hated my life for a long time and was always looking for a reason to leave. One day my ex-employer gave me one. Moved to another state, worked for someone again, was miserable, hated life...
Moved back to my home state, worked for someone, hated life. Realized that some of us are meant to be employees and some of us are meant to be employers. Mine was the later. Started my own buisness, had tons of headaches but through it all, I wouldn't give it up for the world. I create my own time to spend with my family, I am always challenged, not by electrical problems but by buisness problems. It's a whole new learning experience for me. I enjoy that!
Need that!
This is not the remedy for life but maybe a leap of faith wouldn't be a bad idea. Take a challenge that you would not normally take. Get exited over what you are doing. If you can't, do something else. Life is too short to be sad or miserable. Pave your own way and don't let anyone tell you you can't...
Tom
Posted By: master66 Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 12:37 AM
Wow. Reading this string about brings a tear to my eye. I could have written Doc's post myself and then to see so many of you other guys have gone through this "down" time really amazes me.

As most of you know, back at the beginning of July I gave up my business of 10 years and went to work for someone else. One of the reasons that I did it is that I also lost that drive that I had when I started out. You know... hoping to get big, have a lot of jobs going, paying men a living wage (not just for them but something a family could live on also)as well as making a comfortable living for myself and my family.

After losing my a** on a couple of jobs and could no longer see that light at the end of the tunnel, I continued the business because it wasn't just a job it was "ME". I loved what I did so much that I did it far longer than I should have.

Even still when I tell someone that I'm no longer in business, its like I'm telling them that someone died.

The constant struggle of getting jobs, collecting money from customers and paying bills served no other purpose other than to make my suplier, insurance company and banker richer. This never ending cycle is enough to send anyone into what some of you are calling depression.

It was one day that one of my key employees (one of the guys that I was trying to take care of) screwed me over that I finally and literally said "Screw it all!" and gave it up.

As some of you said, sometimes a change is good. But, I miss "MY" business. But working for someone else is getting better.

Getting off at a regular time presents me with a new problem. What do I do after work?
I don't have to do any bids or any other paperwork. Don't have to return phone calls or go look at new jobs. Heck, I never had a hobby. Work was my hobby and my life. What do I do now?

I was working so much that it started affecting my marriage also. This is another reason that I quit.

I once had a girlfriend that was diagnosed with clinical depression and I recognized (or I thought I did)some of the symptoms in myself. I started seeing a therapist who is helping. Just having someone to talk to letting me know that I'm not the only one that goes through this type of thing is very helpful and reassuring.

The therapist says that I'm not suffering from depression and has prescribed no drugs or recommended that I get a physical. Although the physical probably wouldn't be a bad idea.

So my advice Doc is to definatelty talk to your doctor or possibly a therapist. I go every two weeks for about six weeks now. Costs me about $50 per visit. It does help. My wife has noticed a difference.

Your post was a step in the right direction. Keep going. And your apparent faith in God will always help.

The replies to the post were reassuring to me.

We definately have a great group here.
Posted By: spkjpr Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 02:17 AM
Doc, do you enjoy working with youth? I have found at times when it is so hard to go on the youth at my church have helped. By teaching them some of my skills,I also do carpentry, I have realized what I really have. Try Habitat for Humanity volunteer work, work with the youth at church, do any type of volunteer work. I could continue on and echo what others have said but I'll just say hang in there , get some help from a counselor or pastor and I'll be thinking of you. Spkjpr P.S. I'm 45 and have just worked through where you are at.

[This message has been edited by spkjpr (edited 09-23-2002).]
Posted By: Sean WB Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 04:45 AM
Hey watt, Im an hour and a half south of you in Victoria. Feel free to email me from my profile. Lets go fishing. Its great living near the Gulf Of Mexico!! I "guarantee" you a limit of speckled trout.
Anyway, stay honest about your feelings. You are probably right, there is something wrong. I dont know what that is and I wont pretend to know. I believe you have seen what to do, and were unable/unwilling to do something about it. I struggle under same cross as you.

" A man is given a certain amount of time to live. The time he spends fishing doesnt count." [Linked Image]





[This message has been edited by Sean WB (edited 09-24-2002).]
Posted By: electure Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 12:14 PM
Hey, Doc.
I know you've within the last year changed to an all-office=salary=long hours=etc. job.
I'll be 50 in a few days, and at 48 decided that the Proj Mgr job I had was a large part of my lack of personal motivation. I got a different job, back in the field.
I now look forward once again to (most) days at work.
It's tough for someone who's been "out" all his life to be strapped to the desk, FAX, computer, and phone. (Was SlamTex a happier guy?).
The family and the mortgage was all that kept me going for a long time.
Best wishes, hang in, and God be with you...S
Posted By: WARREN1 Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 01:50 PM
Hey Doc
Looks like everything has been said---we have all been there, done that, got over it and kept on going. But we need you to respond as soon as you can. GeeWhiz....we miss you witty closings to your post. I wish I was smart enough to think of those things.
Anyway, we are all keeping you in our prayers.
Posted By: The Watt Doctor Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 02:49 PM
jlmaint, pauluk, bobc, mamills, trainwire, George "wounded leg" Corron, thinkgood, gramps, wirewiz, rmiell, pearlfish, sparky66vw, sparky, currently, arseegee, tsolanto, master66, spkjpr, seanwb, electure, warren1.....
God Speed to all. Open heart surgery may be a daily thing for the Watt Doctor, but I don't normally do it on myself. I've been moved by every comment, and frankly, though I've put my fingers on the keys to respond several times, I couldn't find the words to say. What can I say to a group of people, that I don't know, yet I know very well through the experiences of life? How could I respond to this group of guys that I've never seen, yet see every day in the faces of the men who work in our industry? How could I speak to men who's voices I've never heard, yet I hear every heart? ....I hear... I would love to comment on every post, but at the present, time will not permit. This side of heaven, it will not be known what each of you has done for me by your kind words. The Watt Doctor may have to take a standing 8 count, but let me assure all that he is not out. For now, with all that is in me, thanks.

Down but not out,
Doc

[This message has been edited by The Watt Doctor (edited 09-24-2002).]
Posted By: sparky Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/24/02 08:35 PM
atta boy Doc....
[Linked Image]
your bro's got wide shoulders here , an it ain't thier first rodeo....

some here do the FF or EMS gig (put's on mask & cape) and are aware of burnout....of late we have CISD ( Critical Incident Stress Debriefing), a worthy asset i wish the trade/contracting sector had access to....



[This message has been edited by sparky (edited 09-24-2002).]
Posted By: Sean WB Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/25/02 05:05 AM
http://www.politicsandprotest.org/

This helps me sometimes put my probleems into perspective
Posted By: Bill Addiss Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/25/02 05:22 AM
Doc,

My thoughts are with you too.

Bill
Posted By: mamills Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/25/02 08:26 PM
Sean: Thanks for sharing the link with us.

Mike (mamills)
Posted By: BuggabooBren Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/26/02 12:46 AM
Hey Doc,

What say you plan a hunt or a camping trip or something? If you 'go west, young man' you can come see our rainbow trout, brook trout or browns, too.

I agree that you probably need to check in with your M.D. Don't miss the chance to catch this early, it definitely sounds like clinical depression and the treatments have improved substantially, as mentioned.

I haven't faced job burnout in the same respect although I've just hit my 10-year anniversary by launching a new career within the same employer. I did so after a few years of frustration followed closely by a total collapse in my motivation. I would've gone to pushing a broom in a heartbeat.

I did a couple of things:
1) sought help from a respected friend and a leader in my field of interest (which you've done here). I asked for advice on what I might do to ward of the 'I don't care' attitude. I added that I had been frustrated by the tasks and the lack of progress or recognition and that it seemed so dull to do the same thing in the same environment where nothing seems to change nor make a difference. He suggested I go back to school which I did.
2) I got into a formal mentoring program and one of the most valuable things that came from it was a goal to prove the value of the mentoring to my current group and then build further value on top of that with the thought that it would primarily add value to ME and I could then have more options available if I decided to change careers.
3) I made a commitment to my physical health knowing that my mental health also depends on my physical health. This, for me, does not necessarily include a consistent exercise program. This is more basic. It means adequate sleep since the majority of the American population is sleep deprived. Sleep, by the way, is a major factor in mental health and sleep apnea can create a very real mental health concern, as mentioned above. It also means staying hydrated because in similar fashion, most Americans are dehydrated. Eating right, or at least better, and getting my basic vitamins and minerals with a standard or stress formula one-a-day type supplement (and certainly NOT a whole bunch of supplements taken together just because they promise great effects).

I've walked through a couple of lonesome valleys (death of a child, divorce, etc) and job 'loss'.. even if it's just the loss of motivation in your job... are heavy hitters on the stress scale. They can very easily lead to depression but you've already gained some ground ahead of it by being willing to address the problem head-on.

Hang in there and stay in touch with this gang, it certainly can make a difference in your willingness and ability to keep putting one foot in front of the other so you can get around that bend.
Posted By: Scott35 Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/26/02 04:07 PM
Watt Doc,

I feel for you, guy!!! Been there a bunch of times myself and still wonder when the next one will come.

The only things keeping me from just saying "screw it all" and sleeping all day and night are my Wife's support, the support of my friends and the passion for the fields of Electricity.

I'm going on 38 [will turn 38 on December 21st] and through those past 37 years, so much Chaos has occured it's a wonder that I am still around to be typing this message to you!

For me, things were really dificult between the ages of 20 and 25. Since then, Chaos only visits me once every few years, instead of every other Month!

What makes it all worth while is reflecting back every 3 or so years, and thinking about how much different everything is now compared to then. I'm looking at all the things that have changed over that period, both good and bad. Think about what you were able to do, or what you knew, or even what you have become to know better now, as opposed to say 3 years ago. You were thinking about bad things then too, thinking about giving up on it all, but you have kept going!

Think about the things you know now, as opposed to 3 years ago, now put yourself at that point in time 3 years ago and think about what you knew then as opposed to another 3 years prior.
That should pick you up spiritually big time!!! It always does for me!

I Wish you all the luck and happiness possible!

Scott S.E.T.
Posted By: The Watt Doctor Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/27/02 02:35 AM
Bren, Scott35,
Thanks for your reply. The support from the forum has really helped more than you all know.
As I wrote to another member of the forum, I think a few years ago I gave to much of "myself" to my job. The guy I was working for at the time saw what I was doing, and did nothing to help. I realize that I received a paycheck for working, but I went way beyond the "call of duty". My wife thought the kitchen table was a "print table" because I always had the "next bid" there. Over time I began to see how the my boss "used" people. I realized (as I learned how the "office life" worked) that he took every advantage of me that he possibly could. I saw how he treated others behind their back. As time continued, I continued to "burn the candle at both ends". I was trying to "project manage" during the day, and bid jobs at night. On top of that, I was going to school 2 nights a week to get my master's license. After I landed my master's, I think he was afraid that I was going to quit, and leave him in a bind. So, he hits me with a raise. That raise was hollow at best. He gave it to me one day over lunch, and it was about as empty "spare" conduit stubbed into a lay-in ceiling in a telephone building (by the way phone buildings aren't adding equipment, they are replacing it with smaller equipment that does more work, and faster). Finally one day I just stopped. I told him that he was going to have to manage the projects if he wanted me to bid work, and though he never agreed to do it, that's exactly what happened.
Where, you may ask, has all this taken me? I realized that the reason that I was taken advantage of, was because I didn't step in, and say no. The conclusion is that it was my fault. That may sound alittle self critical, but I think, if you take a close look, you'll agree. So, in that regard, I grew. I learned, but the effects of it all were still there. I became totally apathetic. The last job that I bid for him was a 15KV project. I had never bid one, and have done very little Medium Voltage work, but I put the estimate together anyway. Some of you may remember the post. We missed it by $1000.00. In a $475K bid, we missed it by a $1000.00. The company I am working for now was "courting" me pretty hard, and I went for an interview on a Thursday afternoon. The next morning (a Friday), I went to work, and received a "pink slip". I was totally blind sided, but it was actually a relief for me. The company I now work for called me on Sunday, and offered me my present job. I told them "maybe", and called back a few days later to except. The effects were still there. I grew, but the daily application of the knowledge I obtained is lagging behind. I know these things to be true. I have a great life, and I am valuable, but the wound is still open, and the taste in my mouth is still bitter.
Thanks to all. I shall overcome.

Purple Heart in hand,
Greg
The Watt Doctor
Posted By: BuggabooBren Re: Totally Burned Out - 09/27/02 07:02 PM
Doc,

You've probably come to the best conclusion so far: Just Say NO!...

As you've probably already concluded and as I discovered in my frustration you might have to go way back to the basic principles of a) why you work and b) under what conditions are you willing to work and finally, c) what are the parameters or thresholds that are not to be crossed in order for you to remain satisfied with your position, employer/employment, or your chosen career.

Go back to your values and look at each of the items:
A) Why do you work? Money/provision/financial stability, keeping you off the streets and away from the casino or Cabelos/BassPro Shop, etc., occupy your daylight hours instead of watching soap operas or Regis? Once you know this, you can assess if you're earning enough by taking on the average job offer (average being something within the tolerances set in steps b) & c) that will follow shortly).

B) Does tolerable work mean crawling through attics, digging in ditches, or do you prefer flying a desk and a computer? Does it mean you use your back, your brain, or both? Do you require a challenge, change or a new vista each day or are you more comfortable and well-suited to routines that are repetitive, rarely changing, or changing only marginally over the course of time.

C) What are the thresholds for your tolerance of undesirable conditions? One week a year you're called upon to do 60+hr/wk? Two weeks? 80hrs/wk? Do you readily take work home with you, and if so, how often? Do you take on work you're not trained for & what should you reasonably expect as a return for your investment (that being your added commitment & using your own learning skills to improve the work requested)? For how long would you work untrained or uncompensated for the real level of effort you're expending? etc, etc...

If you are able to 'just say no' at some point and take a step back to gain perspective, it will stop or ease the current whirlwind of both activity and mental anguish and allow you go back and compare your current practices against your values. You may find that you are hard-working, willing to accept the unknown , have a stronger-than-average work ethic and you are willing to help others succeed. Your downfall or weakness may be that you are more willing to give too much, rather than too little - until the well that feeds that spigot of giving begins to run dry. You need to set parameters in that case and stick to them so that you can pace your contribution to last the entire length of your intended career without giving too much nor too little.

I know you may find this laughable but I actually learned that concept from the IRS - they don't expect the citizenry to pay more taxes than they actually owe (although there are many that do and they are the middle to lower levels economically rather than the higher $/economic players).

Good luck & God bless you, it sounds like you're on the right track. Bring the wife or family out west for a vacation, in any case.
Posted By: daniel damon Re: Totally Burned Out - 10/04/02 12:17 AM
hey watt doc,


i know my name is not around ECN much, but hey, we all know how you feel... i did not read all these entries, so i hope i am not repeating. i am 35 and i live with my mother: (i know that is not a repeat), moved back 5 years ago, loser, i know... money was the main reason,and OTHERS. i know the feeling you are going through. your family is the best thing... i wish i had my own. hey,if you need someone to talk to you can email me at danieldamon11@yahoo.com maybe we can talk on the phone, i am good to talk to about things like this... if not,talk to on the ECN....

dan
Posted By: The Watt Doctor Re: Totally Burned Out - 10/04/02 02:22 PM
Thanks again to all. I've felt that I should revisit this thread many times, but circumstances haven't permited me to devote the kind of time that I would like to ECN, much less this thread. You wouldn't think a guy with a name like "The Watt Doctor" would be [Linked Image] by the attention that this thread brought, but I have been. I will say that this thread has been a tremdous lift for me, and I hope that other members will feel free to "vent" from time to time.
One thing that I have learned from all this is that I need a mixture of physical, and office work. It's hard to see progress from behind a desk (others may be able to do it but not me). I always feel better when I contribute by doing part of the work myself. Though taking time off is something that I should do more often, it will be a little more difficult to incorporate into my life. Time off is important, and I am going to have to force myself to do it. The jury is still out (and will be out for some time) on whether I actually carry through with it. Other things I've learned are of a more personal nature, and will most likely remain in this "J-Box" above my neck. I'm sure you all realize that there are a few lose connections, and a bunch of wire nuts up there [Linked Image].
The question remains, "What now?" I think that Chief George "Wounded Leg" Corron answered it well, when he said
Quote
Wish I had a magic solution for you, bro., but there ain't one. One foot in front of the other and eventually the walking becomes normal again.

Walking stick in hand,
Doc
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