Where I worked we detected an element we tentatively called Administronium. The heaviest element yet discovered, with 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons and 111 assistant-deputy neutrons, giving an atomic mass of 312. These are all held together by a force called morons, surrounded by vast numbers of peons. Administronium, having no electrons, is absolutely inert, but it can be detected because it impedes any reaction which contacts it. A tiny quantity causes a reaction normally taking a few seconds to drag on for days or weeks. It has a half-life of about 2.5 years, but it doesn't decay- No! - instead it reorganises a portion of the assistant and deputy neutrons to change places. In fact its mass always increases over time, as morons join assistant-deputy neutrons to form isodopes. Some scientists think that this characteristic of 'moron promotion' means that Administonium forms spontaniously whenever enough morons gather together, the so called "Critical Morass".
Is it a good conductor of electricity? - I dunno- but I'd love to find out!!!!!
Alan

Wood work but can't!