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Hillbilly Medical Terms


Benign.............What you be after you be eight.
Bacteria...........Back door to cafeteria.
Barium.............What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section....A neighborhood in Rome.
Catscan..........Searching for Kitty.
Cauterize........Made eye contact with her.
Colic............A sheep dog.
Coma.............A punctuation mark.
D&C..............Where Washington is.
Dilate...........To live long.
Enema............Not a friend.
Fester...........Quicker than someone else.
Fibula...........A small lie.
G.I.Series.......World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail.........What you hang your coat on.
Impotent..........Distinguished, well known.
Labor Pain........Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff.....A Doctor's cane.
Morbid............A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates...........Cheaper than day rates.
Node...............I knew it.
Outpatient.........A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear............A fatherhood test.
Pelvis...............Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative............A letter carrier.
Recovery Room........Place to do upholstery.
Rectum.................Darn near killed him.
Secretion.................Hiding something.
Seizure...................Roman emperor.
Tablet....................A small table.
Terminal Illness..........Getting sick at the airport.
Tumor.....................More than one.
Urine.....................Opposite of mine.
Varicose..................Near by/close by.



gramps

Bill

[This message has been edited by Bill Addiss (edited 03-13-2003).]

This one makes even more sense when it's said with a thick German/Yiddish/Russian accent.

Not a truer word spoken!


[This message has been edited by iwire (edited 03-13-2003).]

I guess we hillbillies are the only "minority" that can still take a joke.I still use terms that I learned from my parents and grandparents. "Shortly" means within the next hour or 2. "Dreckly" which means the same as directly,could mean 2hours or 2 weeks depending on who said it.A "right smart bit" or "right smart" means a lot. "I'll be dogged" means surprised or annoyed. "Get shut of" means to get rid of or sell. Btw to clear up a misconception any self respectin' southerner would never use the word "Ya'll unless they were talking about more than one person. My Grandfather used the phrase "I guyeah" which means the same thing as "I think". Russell (A Hillbilly all my life)

me too, russell!.. ...how about this one? when we meet somebody from back home, we ask "how's mama-nim"?



gramps

Gramps,did you ever get "whupped with a peachtree limb"? Or go the "eye doctor" or the "tooth dentist"? I bet you and I could carry on a conversation and the rest of the guys wouldn't have a clue as to what we were saying. But it would all be in English.

"am i gonna have to go out back and cut me a switch? you better straighten yoresef up, or i'll tell yore daddy, wen he gits home!!"

i heard that much , much too often!!



gramps

How about the following:
"GOOD NIGHT!" which means "Gosh!"
"I'm fixin' to go to the store" which means I'm going to the store.
"bowa" which means boy.
"hee-ah" which means here. As in, "Come hee-ah bowa."
"hyeah" which also means here. This version is a bit more dignified than the "hee-ah" version.
"I te' you what!", or "Boy le' me tell ya" is a way of letting someone know that you mean what you are saying.
"yonder" which means "over there"

Y'all come back now, Ya hee-ah,
Doc

Glad i'm a Damn Yankee!