great question, no perfect answer.
1. a pulse
2. depends
3. no off the shelf component that i know of, and i haven't checked into all the home automation lines.
one solution is a brand that has a pool automation kit with valve actuators and seperate receiving modules that mount anywhere.
x-10
intermatic
jacuzzi (maybe, sort of)
drawbacks include: no display on the controller, no integral thermostats.
