Nick, you're not cynical, you're an incredible optimist!!
Add to this working by the beach, Coastal Commission, etc.
How about an endangered bug or toad?
On the converse, I walked into the City of Montebello for a TI permit involving quite a bit of machinery, plans (3 sets) in hand...and walked out with a permit.
Yes, the truth comes out after the "prejob" meetings. "RFI's will be answered in a day" (I've waited 4 months).
I usually take a minirecorder into job meetings, turn it on, and set it in the middle of the table. It makes some of the other guys mad, but it sure cuts down on the BS.
