Ol' George,
How's yor'n leg? I ain't fix'd no legs what was busted since I fix'd yor'n. Some a them folks thunk since I was'n a doctor 'n all that I ought to know how to do anything. It's like Ol' Wid'r Jones. She done called me on the bell invention wantin' to know how to take out young Jed's spline. I says, "Wid'r Jones, I ain't that kinda doctor. I'm a doctor of Wattology." She fired right back at me and asked, "Wat is Wattology?" Well I siphered for a minute and replied, "ology is some geek 'r latin surfix what means tha study of. An' watt, well....it means watt?. 'nother wurds when someone like the Wid'r calls an' starts ta askin' me them questions what I don't know, I say real loud, "Watt?" So, 'nother words Wattology is tha study of not knowin' nothin'. By this time the Wid'r was plum mad, and she holler'd, "Yur the only doctor we'n got in the whole trailer park, an' if'n you don't tell me I'ma gonna call Bob, the owner over to the Joe's Auto Repair."
Folks at that time I done remembered what happened the last time yon Bob done did some doctorin'. Ol' man Tom's pacin' machine's battries had run plum down. Well, Bob, the owner over to the auto shop had been doin' a bunch a work on a 1971 Pinto, an he had siphered a way to get Ol' man Tom's heart jump started. Well, to make a long story short, when Ol' man Tom Jones went home that night Mrs. Jones done wopped him on the backside with a fry'n pan. Well, you guessed it. It done blowed Ol' man Tom through the roof of that there trailer, an all they ever found of him was his boondockers. 'n that there was how the Wid'r Jones, become the Wid'r Jones.
But any you folks out yonder needin' yur busted leg fix'd just ask yon George up yonder way. I done a mighty fine job own his. Heck, with that extention ring on the bottom of his shoe, he can walk just fine. Shoot with som'a Wid'r Jones's corn liquor in 'im, he might even run a spell or two.
Whattologically Yur'n,
Doc