neutral feeder is pulling 250amps and is warm to the touch. The phase conductors in the feeder are pulling 180 to 190 amps and are hot to the touch. Any ideas on why the phase conductors are hotter than the nuetral and how to fix?
Possibly loose connections of the ungrounded conductors to the panel lugs or lugs to panel.
You did not say the panel rating or if the 4/0 is AL or CU.
To me what you described sounds like a 75 KVA transformer feeding a 225 amp panel with 4/0 copper.
If I assumed wrong disregard the following.
If that is the case 180 amps is the highest allowed continuous load for this panel. The transformer would be rated 208 amps.
There is only one way to fix this and that is reduce the load.
You could run a second 4/0 neutral and try to order a 200% rated neutral bar for this panel to deal with the high current on the neutral.
After doing this you will still have an overloaded panel. The transformer will also still be dealing with 250 amps on the neutral. Ron or Dereck could say if this will shorten the transformer life.
BTW, I hope these are copper conductors.