Aussie, if you want to see how stupid and uneducated people really are after 10 years or more of compulsory education, watch some tv quiz shows-
QM: What is the National Anthem of New Zealand, apart from 'God Save the Queen'?
Contestant: Australia Fair?
QM: What 'A' is a dead-ended tube in the human intestine with no known function?
C: The arse.
QM: There are three states of matter, solid, liquid and ....?
QM: An Indian leader's name: Mahatma, his surname began with 'G'...?
C: Oh, I know that one Bob! Is it Geronimo?
QM: What religeon is the Pope?
C: Er... Is it Jewish?
Exasperated QM: That's close enough!
My all time favorite has to be Bob Monkhouse's story of a contestant on ITV's 'The Golden Shot'
, where you guided a blindfolded guy, [ Bernie the Bolt ], with a crossbow, over the phone, to hit a target for big prizes. After several lunatic wild shots hit various extremities of the set, Bob patiently explains off camera how to hit the bullseye, only to discover that the guy's tv had been repossessed a week earlier!
When Bob remonstates "Listen, Sir, you can't play this game without a ruddy television set!", the contestant explains: "I know that, Bob, I'm not stupid, you know Bob,... I'm in a phone box outside Rumbelow's Electrical shop, Bob, but all the sets in the window are tuned to the BBC!"
As to smoke alarms, a local thicko told me a few months ago that the regular 'beep' from his showed it was monitoring the house constantly , a "small price to pay for the security" ! Arggghhh!