First one was a lead from SM. The customer and his brother-in-law framed an additon to the house, did all of the wiring and all they needed me to do was pull the electrical permit, sign off on the work they did. That's all !!!

Second, GC calls and says, "Your price is good. However, my other EC only charges $20.00 per low voltage opening and you want $60.00. So I will deduct $500.00 from you price and give you the job."

WOW !!! THANKS !!! Can you give me the name of the other EC. I would love to sub him out for all of my low voltage work at $20.00/opening.....

Just thought I would share the comedy.

Gee don't all of you guys let the homeowner do all the work (on your permit) and just charge to hook up the wires to the breakers?
From what I see on the DIY BBs that seems to be what happens all over the country.

I had a fun one today. The job is to repalace/repair ONE troffer. I bid it & she says "We have to get three bids and run it through the corporate office". Good thing it was only 30 seconds from the office & took 30 seconds to bid.

Dave

Lady: "How much would you charge to repair my kettle?"

Me: "$60/hour plus materials and taxes"

Lady: "But I can buy a kettle from Walmart for $10"

Me: "Precisely."

Lady" "But I really like this kettle."

Me: "The ones you can get for $10 at Walmart boil water just as good"

Lady: "Ok, thankyou, bye."

Me: "Sigh."

Customer "We've got no hot water"
Me "So it's just coming out cold"
Customer "No, no water at all"
Me "so it's a plumbing problem"
Customer " Does that mean you can't fix it?"
Me " You need a plumber. I'm an electrician"
Customer "Oh" "Click"

Not a problem. Just invent 2 more business names and give her 3 quotes. That's how I used to do it when working for the government and buying supplies.

My son sells, among other office products, a large flatpack cardboard waste-bin, c/w poly bag liner, used mainly for office wastepaper, cola cans, paper cups, etc..
He gets regular calls from customers asking him to come & empty the bin as it's now full! How he stays polite to the dolts who whine " Well, your number is printed on the side of the bin." is beyond me.
I keep telling him to advise them they need to compact the contents by getting in the bin and jumping up and down, but he's too sensible, like his Mum!


Alan

ok, who's going to collect all these stories and write a book?

I had a good one too. Heating and air contractor wanted me to lend him my name so he could pull permits and do all the work himself. All I had to do was inspect his work if I wanted. I said sure, but I had to do all the work at my usual price and charge my time for pulling permits, but he could clean up after if he wanted.
He never called back.

I remember trying to get driving instructions to this clueless individual's home...

Turn left onto ? and go half way down the street.

Oh, so I can see the end of your street as soon as I turn onto it?

No.

So how do I know that I'm half way down?

He described the distance a little better and said, "Just turn right into the driveway."

So you live on the right side of the street?

No, I'm on the left side but you can turn right in.

Joe

From my days as a maintenance tech.:

Knock on the door: "Howdy, ma'am, what seems to be the problem?"
"My heat ain't working!"
It sure seemed cold in there, so I head on over to the furnace. The fan is up and running, so I know I've got power. What usually happens is one of the two 5kW heating coils would fail, and the tenant would never notice the difference. Then when the second one failed years later, suddenly there's a no-heat situation.

I open up the control panel and see if I have voltage across the heating coils. 241 V., check. That tells me my control circuits are up and running. I trip the breaker and ring out the coils, they both read a couple of ohms. Tells me my coils are good.

So, why in the world is it so cold in this house? I go and I look at the thermostat (I should have started there...) and find it set on 59 degrees.

"Ma'am. The reason it's so cold in here is that you have your thermostat set on 59."
She looks me dead in the eye: "So?!?"
Me: "...Uh, well, if you want it to be warmer than 59 degrees you have turn the thermostat up."
Tenant: "I shouldn't have to do that!(that part killed me)If I turn it up my light bill goes up to!"
Me: "Yes, ma'am, that's because this is an electric furnace..."
Tenant: "That's because this furnace is cheap! Ya'll can't give us nothing that works right."

Apparently the expensive furnaces actually produce heat without using power. Who knew one of the selling features was defying the laws of physics...?

-John

I received a call from a woman who wanted to have recessed lights installed, before she painted, which was a good idea. I told her that there would probably be access holes. She told me that she knew that from a call she made to another EC. She said that the other EC would have the ceiling ready for paint when he was finished. She asked me if I would patch the access holes like the other EC, I told her no. She then said " but I'm a single parent". Whatever that means, I told her to call the other EC back.

I received another call that went like this:
Customer: 'lectrica
Me: yes
Customer: you come now?
Me: come now? I don't know who you are
Customer: you come now?
Me: what is your name and address?
Customer: agghhh!! and he hung up

I spent a couple of years working in a theatrical rental shop. We rented lighting, staging, special effects, cable, power distro, scenic draperies, etc.

I used to get calls, generally on Friday afternoon at about 4:30, asking "you went pawtee liite?" Excuse me? "you went pawtee liite?" Could you repeat that slowly? (finally figured out that they were asking "do you rent party light?")..

The answer is Yes, we do rent lights, that can be used for parties.. what are you trying to accomplish? how big a space? what sort of lghting do you want? what is your budget? when do you need the equipment?

I told them to come to the shop, we close at 5:30, so get here by 5, and bring somebody who speaks at least some english..

(not to bash non-english speakers.. I've dealt with theatre techs from Taiwan who spoke no english, with the aid of a student translator, and pretty much all I had to do was point at a few places on the sound patchbay before the guy gave me a double thumbs up, and started plugging in cables..)


It seemed like at 5:15 on friday was when everybody would show up to rent lights for the big party that weekend, and we'd have to spend 45 minutes getting their order pulled, and loaded out the door.. This was always the folks who had no clue what they wanted..

Then there was the regular customer who would call up at 4, saying that his client just called and wanted lighting for his event, and could we set him up with his usual package, and that he's be there close to 5:30.. (this wasn't so bad, since his package was quick to pull, and used equipment that wasn't used very often, so chances were that it was in the same state that it was in when he returned it last time..)

Just got a call from a GC I've worked with many times asking if I was registered in Will County. "Not sure if it has lapsed or not" I told him. "Why, what do you have in mind?"
"It's just to get a permit released in my neighborhood," he tells me. "Then when we're ready in about four weeks if your available you can do the work, or if we change contractors we'll file the necessary paperwork."
Well Will County requires a letter of intent from the contractor. "Is that something I can just type up with your letterhead and run it down there?"
"do you intend to have me do the work?"
"hang on, let me get right back with you."

He knew to get off the radio at that point, because my next statement was going to be, regardless of his "yes" or "no", "Quite honestly, not having seen a print or given you a price, I don't really intend to do the work, so to put that on paper and submit it would be a lie." But like I said, he knew where this was going.

"WHAT DID YOU DO?"

It was a customer that was having some pretty major problems.

I had just gotten back to the office after a job walk at a (totally unrelated) building right next door to him.
I had short cut through his parking lot about an hour earlier, and he saw the truck.

When he started having problems, he was sure I'd been doing something that must have caused it

I drove back the 20 or so miles and fixed him up.

Seems that electrical systems and film projectors have the same sense of humor.

I have had a few calls where, in a multiplex theater, I would repair one machine and hours or a few days later another machine would have a totally unrelated breakdown!!

Oh, and film projectors have a rule: they'll never break down when the theatre is not full!! They wait until it's a packed house, usually on a Friday or Saturday night.

Logical I guess since the machine's entire existance is spent looking out that glass port....

edited for spellins...

[This message has been edited by mxslick (edited 04-19-2006).]

That is like doing maintenece work. I use to work for restaraunts, schools, churchs, etc. When something goes down, they want you NOW!!!, not later but NOW!!! I was out on Sunday's at 4:00 pm becuase to roof exhaust fan for a large rest. went down. (This was years ago and supply houses wern't open on Sun. I was out at 4:00 PM on New Years eve. because a rest. went down. (Found out there was a large power outage. The POCO lost several towns to a black out. The Rest. owner said that he was haveing a big party and was there anything I could do. I said YEAH, PRAY that the power comes back on!

Well, the thermostat was working......

That kind of reminds me of the one from years ago where somebody thought that he could save money by wiring a 3kW heater onto a 5-amp (240V) lighting circuit.

"If it's only got 5 amps it's going to be cheaper, right?"

I guess he may have had a point at that. After the fuse blew he'd have been saving money by having neither heat nor lights!

Harold's post above reminds me of a tech support call I recently heard about. . .

Customer: My computer shut down and won't come back on.

TS: Can you look to be sure it didn't become unplugged accidently?

Cust: No.

TS: Why not?

Cust: Becuase it's dark.

TS: Can you turn on a light?

Cust: No.

TS: Why not?

Cust: Becuase the power is out, and the whole neighborhood is dark.

I love it when the office at the housing dev. calls and says "we have no power in the upstairs bedrooms in the 1st model". I go over and change the light bulbs"again".and call them back telling them that its all fixed now....

Ohhh, that statement is fantastic!
Heard it too many times, with so many "Oh, Sorry To Blame You" results, it would fill this thread with fonts beyond capacity!

However...

Got two good recent "WHAT DID YOU DO?" stories to throw out.

"Whad'ja Do" Story #1:

This one involves a new Teppan Style Restaraunt, attempting to receive a TCO (Temporary Certificate of Occupancy).

Fire Inspector on site goes to test the "Ansul" System (Fire Supression System), to verify interlocks for the hoods + all bells and whistles work as they should.
Owner + Ansul Technician on site for test.

Interlocks and such work properly, however when the Inspector flipped on the Light Switch for one of the Hood's Lights, a relay began to freak out - and quickly caught fire!

Of course, the story we receive is:
"All the Hoods are short circuiting, and _EVERY_ Relay has fried, _ALONG_ with the Make Up Air control not working... GET DOWN HERE IMMEDIATELY!!!"

I get there the following morning, hear several stories prior to actually seeing any equipment.
Ansul guy arrives around 7:30 AM, and he has a different story.

Well, after checking every part of the Lighting Circuitry, it turns out that only one relay actually fried. It's failure was due to an incorrect mounting in the panel (it was mounted over a backed out screw head, which caused the relay to bend out of shape).
This resulted in the relay's contacts not seating completely, and ended up barbequeing the relay, due to red hot contacts!

There was one other problem, the fire supression interlocking switches were either connected in reverse (across the N.O. contacts, when it should have been thru the N.C. contacts), or the Limit Switch was completely broken - none of this was our responsibility (we did not terminate these interlocks or anything at the panels).

Spent a whole day on this one - and actually got some "Thank You's" + "Sorry To Blame You's".
That's a first!

"Whad'ja Do" Story #2:

Helping a Friend do some HVAC related work (upgrading control systems + equipment for HVAC and dampers + control in large air handlers on Schools).
We are "Knee-Deep" in Air Handler stuff, when his Cell Phone starts ringing, and ringing, and ringing!!!

Turns out to be the Supervisor (read "Stupidvisor") for the GC on some Custom House my Friend was doing.
The House was trimmed out for Power Electrical System items (Fixtures, Switches, Receptacles, Panelboards trimmed out, etc.).
Final Inspection had not been done yet, and the temp. power pole was still in the front yard.

Stupidvisor calls up with a doozy!

Stupidvisor: "The Doorbell Does Not Work"

Friend "OK, That's Probably Because There Is No Power Yet"


Stupidvisor: " But I Hooked It Up Where It Should Be, And It Worked Before"

Friend "It Worked Before???"


Stupidvisor: "Yes, It Worked Before, Then You Came By And Did Something In The "Big Panel" (Main Service), Now It Does Not Work"

Friend "Whaaaaat??? .. Let Me Call You Back"

He hangs up, then starts thinking about the doorbell situation. It is supposed to be part of the Intercom/Whole House Audio system, and therefore there is no location for the door chime, nor is there any doorbell button wiring.

Just then, the phone rings again, and it's our friend, Mr. Stupidvisor.


Stupidvisor: "Well, Are You Coming Down Here To Fix This, Or What?"

Friend "First Off, The House Has No Power, And Unless This Is A Battery Powered Doorbell, It Won't Possibly Work - AND Secondly, The Doorbell Is Part Of The Intercom Stuff, So Just Where Exactly Are You Connecting A Doorbell Anyway???"


Stupidvisor: "It Worked Fine Before You Came Here"

Friend "OK, Wait Until The Power Gets Turned On And It Will Work Again"

Somehow gets off the phone quickly, but the stupidvisor called endlessly that day.

Finally, a call was made to the actuall GC regarding this extremely important issue, and guess what??? that stopped the crazy phone calls!!!

Have no idea what ever happened with that stupidvisor, or the infamous "Self Powered/Wireless Doorbell", but that one had us both going crazy trying to make the joker understand that he really needs to stop smoking crack on the job!


So far, these two stories are the best this year!

Stay tuned for further developments

Scott35

edited for spellin' - hope I caught all the miss steaks ! < D'OHH >

[This message has been edited by Scott35 (edited 04-21-2006).]

I was wiring a new supermarket and the PoCo guys are on top of the awning connecting the new aerials. With the end of one phase still sitting on the metal roof they accidently stuck the other end into the live side of the service fuse. All of a sudden there are sparks flying out of everything, out of the sides of metal door frames and all over the place. All the other trades thought it was something I had done and wanted my blood.

I was doing some work in the state office of a large national company and went round to every desk telling everyone that the power was going out for a few minutes. I got the OK from everyone but when I came back I was told no one is going home tonight thanks to you. It turned out the woman who works out the wages didn't realize computers need power and they lost the weeks pays for every employee in the state.

"Alan? When are you coming round to fix my bloody electrics!! You said straight away and it's been weeks...etc. etc. ....." , the irate voice gave me a right earfull dahn the dog-and-bone[telephone].
I sussed the gravel-toned East-End accent of 'Scrapyard John', and in a slight lull in the torrent of adjectives I interrupted-
"Oi, John, which Alan do you fink this is?"
"er..'Alan the Sparks'?"
"No, it's Alan the Wood'."
"Oh, sorry Alan! Must have got the number wrong." ...pause... "'Ere, when are you coming round to fix my bloody stairs!" -a quick witted response which got us both laughing. I should explain that it's a cockney thing here to give descriptive nicknames to us ex-pats. I like '11 o'clock John' best - describing the fact he does not get up too early in the morning.

Alan the Wood

Not really electical but none the less, I work in IT and I got a call from someone with a big printer which kept jamming paper and wouldnt print. These printers take 2500 sheets of paper or 5 reams. When I went up, the numpty had loaded 2500 sheets of paper without unwrapping them from the packet! Of course, it was my fault for not having a suitable warning notice for it.

just remember, for every idiotic warning sign you see (IE Caution Coffee is Hot) there is an idiot out there that caused that sign to be made.

Got a call from a regular customer who was moving into a new Building no power to the A/C. Asked if A/C guy had checked it. They say He checked and there was no power to the unit. Go over open the panel and the breakers are on so head to the roof. There are 2 new 10 Ton A/C and one OLD larger unit. The smaller units had power and one of them was running. Go back down and look and the old unit was abandoned no duct no wire nothing. Find the 2 thermostats in the office and turn them up and they work fine. Tell the customer what I found.Get a call next morning from A/C guy "you moron there is no power to the A/C what did you do yesterday"? Back I go to check power again. Thermostats are off so turn them on. Works fine. The customer calls A/C guy to meet me on site. I showed him what I found and he said "not my fault they should have removed the OLD A/C when thy abandoned it". I think the customer uses a differant A/C guy now. Rod

When my wife was selling HVAC they had problems with throwing the wrong unit off the roof. Maybe the installer was just being careful