ECN Forum Forums General Topics of the Trade General Discussion Area How many forum posters does it take to change a light bulb?

How about 1 AHJ to red flag the whole job!?

A variation on the lightbulb joke:

Q. How many MicroSoft employees does it take to change a lightbulb?

A. None. Bill Gates just defines darkness as the new industry standard.

**BUMP**

In the cinema business, the best way to start a fight is bring up what to call the light source for a projector:

The device for providing the light (luminare) is known as a Lamphouse;

The device which produces the light is technically called a Xenon Short Arc Lamp, but:

It's referred to as a Xenon Bulb, which rankles the so-called engineers;

The manager who's calling about the explosive failure of the Xenon Bulb just says that "something blew up in the Christie {A very popular brand of Lamphouse} thing and now the screen is dark.";

Of course, none of this debate matters to the 500+ pi***d off people who don't get to see the rest of the movie!!

The real fun begins when you try to talk to the 16-year-old popcorn kid who barely knows how to thread the film and needs help to get the show running again. Makes a lot of the folks y'all run into in the trade seem downright intelligent!

Arrgghhh! Noooo! We've been Lurked!

Lurk away I needed a good laugh this morning.

How many Apprentice Electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it'll take him about 3 years.

How many Journeyman Electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb. And one to pound it in with a jack-hammer.

How many Electrical Contractors does it take to change a light bulb?
Who knows, they're always kept in the dark!

How many Electrical Contractors does it take to change two light bulbs?
Still only one. But first, he'll have to rewire in a new 200A service right back to the panel.

How many hack 'electricians' does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. But first he'll have to go to the supply house for a couple rolls of duct tape.

How many French electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to figure how to get the bulb out of the packaging, one to turn off the power, one to drive the van to the cafe for the two hour lunch, one to solder the wires onto the bulb tits, and one to telephone for an ambulance.

Alan

Wouldn't the French guy give up immediately and wait for the allies to come do it for them.

Put me on trial I'm guilty of lurking!
Variation on the Microsoft Joke:
"How many Windows Users does it take to change a light bulb? None, they all switched to Macs.
You can guess what OS I use!

Ian

[This message has been edited by Theelectrikid (edited 07-11-2005).]

Alan said:


{Think "Bevis and Butthead" here:}

"Heh,heh, he said bulb tits.."

Seriously, do the French still use solder-on connections for their luminares?

Lurker? I resemble that remark...LOL
Besides, it's fun to bring back some topics from the forgotten...

Well, I guess I asked for it posting that, since explaining a joke usually ruins it, but to answer the questions;
Soldering bulbs. A surreal thought, but the French use identical bulbs to the US/UK, screw in or bayonnette & I only 'soldered the wires to the bulb' as lead-in for the 'ambulance' punch line.
Oh dear!, (Oops-a-daisy!), 'Beavis + Butthead t*ts' means exactly the same in the UK, but also means a mechanical projection too, as well as a group of small garden birds. What was I thinking!
Waiting for the allies?, Yearning more like, but they whiled away the time fruitfully with the resistance movement. If your house is ablaze- wait for the Fire Department. Good joke though!
Alan